What Did You Expect?

What Did You Expect?

A Reflection …

Some individuals approach marriage with the thought that their spouse will meet all their needs… the proverbial knight in shining armor or captivating Cinderella.

One of the assessment tools I use when doing pre-marital  counseling evaluates the intensity of  unrealistic expectations. Such expectations can be a setup for disaster. When the honeymoon is over and reality sets in; the wake-up call is far from blissful.  Of course unrealistic expectations can happen in many other areas of life and be as equally jolting.

Using a different assessment tool, I discovered something about moi and that is my number one talent/strength is *connectedness. Like all strengths and gifts it has its weaknesses… and for connectedness one of them is idealism. In other words…unrealistic or idealistic expectations. As I surveyed my life I saw places in my past where this rang true… two instances stood out. One was a company I had worked for that boasted of a mission statement that was little more than words on a page.  The second was a philanthropic group I worked with for a short stint. Some of its volunteers appeared to be driven by ego and self promotion with little concern for its mission. At least that’s how I saw it. My reaction in both cases was disappointment, but worse a critical spirit.

Prov 16:18 says, “Pride goes before destruction, a haughty spirit before a fall.” Haughty is an ugly word, but I’m afraid it may have fit well in these incidents. With this new insight, it was time for me to own up and face the music. Time to repent and allow God to do the heart work that needed to be done.

I am reminded at what the Lord said to Israel in Jeremiah 18:6 He said, “Can I not do with you, Israel, as this potter does?” declares the LORD. “Like clay in the hand of the potter, so are you in my hand…” God continues in His mercy and grace to mold this piece of clay…me, a work in progress. For the record, He has much work to do, but I trust Him and His promise that says, And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion…” Phil 1:6

I rejoice…it’s a new day.

*Clifton Strengthsfinder

Merry Christmas Everyone!